I’m no Julia Child, but I can cook a mean alfredo sauce while sitting on my booty

And if being able to complete all of the steps required to make my mom’s alfredo sauce, a.k.a. “white” sauce, that delicious worth-the-possible-heart-attack butter, cream, and parmesan cheese creation with only the use of these curled up fingers, arm muscles that work at 50%, AND sitting in a wheelchair the entire time, I figure that‘s still impressive…right?

Cooking for me has been quite the learning process in the years since acquiring my spinal cord injury. I grew up watching my mom impress all of her friends several times a year with fabulous dinner parties, replete with crab legs, homemade pastas, and fancy champagnes. And when I got hurt at 14, my dreams of one day emulating my mom’s own fabulousness felt like a dream that would never come true. I could see no possible way how I could ever entertain as a C6 quadriplegic.

And of course, through occupational therapy sessions and by meeting other people with disabilities baking cakes (long story), I was proven wrong. Many quads, paras, and people with a myriad of other mobility disabilities cook everyday. Sure, watching me cook may freak some people out because I hold, pour, stir, open packages – and everything else – differently (and use my mouth quite a lot), but as long as the food is cooked properly and is tasty when it comes out, what does it all matter?

For a lot of cooks with disabilities, many have found ways to change their recipes to better suit their abilities. A great example of how this can be done is at Thanksgiving. Instead of baking a full (and dreadfully heavy) turkey, why not bake a few turkey breasts? They’re easier to manage for people with decreased upper-body strength because they‘re lighter, and yes they really do taste just as good (just don‘t let them dry out).

And it’s good to know your limits. I once knew a C6 quad who attempted to remove a pot roast from the oven, lost her hold on it and the entire thing came spilling out of the pan and onto her lap. She suffered multiple 3rd degree burns, but she eventually healed up. Please…don’t let this happen to you.

Never forgetting this story, I prefer to cook stove top-based recipes, from sauces to basted eggs to stir fried rice to chicken breasts sautéed in yellow onion, cooked in cream, red whine and fennel. There are more than enough stove-based recipes to keep me busy cooking for several lifetimes. If you’re not sure how to find stove-based recipes, Google “skillet meals” and thousands (not an exaggeration) of recipes will be at your fingertips.

Another trick I’ve learned is to prep. I frequently have my caregiver take down certain pans, glass plates, blenders that are stored above the fridge, anything that I know will give me a hard time if I try to do it later on my own. It might be more mentally taxing to have to prepare so far ahead of time in the day, as I frequently find myself doing so 10am discussing with my PCA what needs to be taken down or cut up so I can cook after work. But to say, “I cooked that!” and know in my heart that it’s the God’s honest truth – THAT – makes it all worth while.

Last month I hosted my first dinner party. I invited seven close friends and served roasted chicken encrusted in rosemary, sage and thyme, along with roasted red potatoes, onion, and zucchini. It went great, I had no leftovers, and the best part? Looking down on my party in 3rd person that night (don’t you ever do that?), knowing I was finally emulating my mom’s fabulousness. It was an amazing “I finally conquered that!” experience, an experience everyone with a disability needs to have happen at least once in their life.